Data Damen mate

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OBLIGATORY FILLER MATERIAL – Just take a hard left at Daeseong-dong…7

2020.04.17 14:54 Rocknocker OBLIGATORY FILLER MATERIAL – Just take a hard left at Daeseong-dong…7

Well, when the props fouled the third time, I suggested we call it a day, as we’d already made some 32 sea-kilometers. We were out on the fringes of the worst of the kelp forest beds, and after a good night’s sleep, we’d be ready to deploy bright and early and get some seismic data acquired and recorded.
But, first, there was the first night aboard ship. In a rusty old tin-can with few creature comforts, as the annual winter monsoon winds wane and the seas actually begin to settle slightly.
I took that as both good omens. The bitching and kvetching I head from the locals about the ‘abominable weather they had to endure’, even from the Coast Guard types, really struck me as uproariously funny.
I just chalked it up to being sequestered from the rest of the world for so long. Put these characters in the path of a Midwestern tornado, East Indian summer monsoon, or Siberian blizzard, and they’d shit themselves blind. I didn’t really think too much of it, although it became somewhat of a game when the imperialistic foreigners tried to one-up each other with horror stories from excursions past.
“No shit”, Dax said, “We were snowed in for a full fortnight.”
“No!” several of us recoiled in mock horror.
“Oh, yah, hey.” Dax continued, “It’s just great when blizzards snap the power lines, and all the toilets freeze. The house cat didn't die until we burned up all our wood. Considering we ate her raw, she tasted pretty good…”
Several of our handlers, a few in the Coast Guard and most of the Korean scientists reacted rather badly to Dax’s story; especially when it had been gorily translated.
Seeing this, Dax stood up, got the soju bottle, and asked if anyone needed a top-up. I asked while puffing away on a large Jamaican cigar if anyone needed a smoke.
At this point, Dax was winning. He had seven of the assembled crowd run to the rail to relieve themselves of our canned Chinese dinner.
Not ever one to shrink from a challenge, I related my second-hand story of my Brother-in-law, who was in the US Coast Guard for years and years. I waited for the green crowd to re-join us and regain what remained of their composure. I figured the quasi-military national Coast Guarders here would appreciate the tale.
Mine wasn’t a gory or shocking tale, just one of the incredible water conditions off the coast of California.
I waited until everyone was settled, drink in hand, and smokin’ ‘em if you got ‘em.
“Well”, I said, “It was on board a ship much like the one we’re currently on,” I said as a rascal wave broke over the railing in counterpoint. “About the same size as this vessel, but with smaller wheels. You know these Coast Guard shallow-water boys”, I chuckled. Always meaning to jab one group or another in the place where I know it stings.
Yeah, I’m a real bastard that way sometimes.
The Korean Coast Guarders sneered hardly at me; but not too hard. They liked my cigars, cigarettes, and open disbursement policy too much.
“Yeah, anyways”, I continued, “He was offshore California in one of the US Coast Guard cutters. It was a boat about 26 meters or so in length. They were out doing search and rescue after a mega-nasty storm blew in from the west and scuttled a sailing regatta race.”
I was drawing them in with my ‘just so’ story, nice and easy, until…
“Yeah, there were several capsized monohulls, catamarans and trimarans. Damn, these things were fucking yachts. Owned by rich idiots that almost knew how to sail but didn’t know enough to get out of the way of a fucking severe storm…”
I really had their attention with ‘soaking the rich’.
“Well, the waves grew and grew, but my Brother-in-laws's boat was built to handle severe weather. These patrol and rescue boat has the capability to roll over 360 degrees and self-right within 30 seconds. Like right now, you’d never even notice this degree rock and roll”, I said as I demonstrated with my cigar, tracing out tighter and tighter rolls, and higher degrees of rocking and rolling.
“They were approaching a capsized trimaran, but the waves kept growing and growing…” I said, leading by example and having them watch me with unblinking attention.
“The waves grew and grew, and normally you’d take these head-on. But that was impossible, because when afternoon came it was slashin' rain, in the face of a hurricane west wind. The boat rolled to the left, heeled, almost keeled, a then rolled the other way just as quickly.” I noted.
They followed me as I timed it with the heavings of our own boat, to the left…to the right…
“Then, just as they were about to reach upon the trimaran, a rogue wave! Out of nowhere”, I said, rocking and rolling along with our own little boat, “BAM! Hit amidships! It didn’t roll once, it rolled twice!” I made great and magniloquent gestures of a tiny boat being savaged by a monstrous rogue sea wave.
I stood up, blew a great blue cloud of smoke towards the poop deck, and said, loudly, “Rolled over once. A full 360! Then rolled right over again. A full 720 degrees!” as I demonstrated what happened with my cigar and drink.
The eyes following me rolled and rolled as well. Some straight back into the owner’s head and some to the left, some to the right…it was like ‘Loose Slots’ night in Vegas, they were rolling and rolling.
And then racing for the rails. Topside to deliver the remains of their hearty canned dinners.
“Beat you, Dax!” I smiled as I sat back down, “I got nine with that at one. And two of them were Coasties!”
“Did that really happen?” Ivan asked.
“According to my Brother-in-law. But he’s an engineer if you know what I mean…” I smiled.
We concluded story night as we had drifted free of the kelp forest and the Captain of the boat decided he’d risk an anchorage for the night. The weather was ameliorating, the seas calming themselves down, and the wind dropping a couple of notches on the Beaufort Scale.
“Well, gents”, I said, “I need some air. The aroma down here of Chinese Aplo™ for dinner, those who didn’t make it to the rails, and the solitary head for the entire crew has lost its charm. If you’ll excuse me”, I said as I grabbed a bottle of ersatz vodka, and several cans of Taedonggang beer, “I’ll be on the aft deck; in my comfy chair and contemplating the wonder of it all.”
With that, I ventured up the stairs and out onto the aft deck.
Dax naturally followed and he found his own not-bolted-down deck chair. We had a constant flow of visitors, foreign and nationals alike. It was shaping up to be a fine night for being out under the stars, there was no light pollution at all. We sat in our chairs, drank our drinks, smoked our smokes, and argued the finer points of astronomy as seen from this part of the world.
I had several side chats with the scientists and academicians from the Korean side. They all had one thing on their minds. Well, one thing after cigars and cigarettes. They wanted Western scientific journals. They were actually trying to bribe me to get those copies, any age, any subject; of Science, AAPG Explorer, and SEPM Proceedings, anything of Western science as it is today. I said they were welcome to a couple of copies of Science and SPE journals I had brought with as an afterthought, for free. With 900 won to the dollar, they needed every won they could get. I wasn’t about to take anything for the free dissemination of knowledge.
However, if they saw it fit to buy me a drink or seven, I wouldn’t object.
In reality, I’d buy those as well.
We made secret pacts to meet at the hotel-casino the night before we left, whenever the fuck that would be. We had a lot of work before us as it stands. It won’t be for a few weeks, I reminded them.
They had no problem. If I could ask the other in the team if they’d do likewise, the appreciation would be palpable.
Great. Now I have to go get my field notebooks and make some more new entries.
Dax cratered around 0100. I elected to stay the night and sleep under the stars as the boat slowly rocked one way and rolled the other. It was quiet, dark as a tomb, and brilliantly lit up by the stellar backbone of the night once the clouds fumbled out. Tomorrow looked as if it were to be bright and sunny if the gentle westerlies had anything to say about the next day’s conditions.
The next day dawned early, bright, and ridiculously sunny as it usually does when the monsoons have departed and it had stopped raining.
“OK.”, I thought, “Time for a hearty breakfast. For someone else. I wonder what’s available here.”
I ventured down to the cold galley and there were several boxes of dry Chinese breakfast cereal, “Shredded Tweet” and the like, some sort of obviously aged bakery, and a case of Taedonggang beer.
“Hmmm”, I mused out loud, “Beer and rice crispies. Breakfast of champions.”
Dax walks in, rubbing his eyes. He sees me drowning my rice cereal in foamy ersatz milk.
“Reminds me of field camp!” I smiled as I chowed on the morning’s offerings.
After our ‘hearty’ breakfast, all the scientific parties gathered in the main stateroom. It was cramped, but the walls were magnetic and we could hang maps, well, charts actually since we’re well offshore now, and plots the day’s course.
Out in the Yellow Sea, we were supposedly over a subsurface, and by dint of being offshore, submarine, dome. Salt dome? Unlikely. Probably more of a shale dome, which isn’t a bad thing when hunting for oil and gas.
Looking at the charts, I ask the locals what our current position was relative to the domal uplift.
After several long moments of silence, I asked again.
“Umm, guys”, I said, “If you’re not going to be forthcoming with something as simple as positional data, then turn this boat 1800’s and take us back to shore. I am fed up, as are my team, with this tight-holing of the simplest of data when you are the knotheads that asked us here for help. We get paid either way, and I for one wouldn’t mind being paid triple to sit in the hotel’s basement and drink”
After telling the translator to translate that last part literally, I sat back, pulled out a really nasty cigar, and went through all the threatening moves of firing it up in the enclosed cabin.
“You will have to excuse us”, came the reply from one of the elders, “We are not used to dealing with oegugseon [foreigners].”
“Are you used to following orders?” I asked brusquely.
“Of course!” came the near-unanimous reply.
“Great. Then consider this an order: You will relay the appropriate information when asked by any Westerner on this cruise. Consider it as coming from the Supreme Leader of this expedition.” I noted.
Using the term ‘Supreme Leader’ was both a bow to their current bad-hair-cut in charge and my desire to let them know I was serious as a kick to the scrotum about the whole fucking deal.
There were a couple of gasps and some consternatious talk, but eventually, one brave soul got up, walked over to the chart, and pointed to our relative location.
“There”, I added, “That wasn’t so hard, was it? Didn’t hurt in the least, did it?”
There were a few chuckles amongst our national colleagues, so I figured that was at least a little progress.
“OK, then”, I continued, “Volna? Ack? You’re up to bat.”
I turned the proceedings over to the geophysicists. They would devise the configuration of the towed array, our speed, direction, charge size, which was based on depth, and all the other geophysical flips and twists one has to do in order to acquire the best data.
This shit doesn’t come cheap. The Mesozoic-Paleozoic marine residual basin in the South Yellow Sea where these domes live is a potentially significant deep potential hydrocarbon reservoir. However, the imaging of the deep prospecting target is quite challenging due to the specific seismic-geological conditions. In the Central and Wunansha Uplifts, the penetration of the seismic wavefield is limited by the shallow high-velocity layers (HVLs) and the weak reflections in the deep carbonate rocks. With the conventional marine seismic acquisition technique, the deep weak reflection is difficult to image and identify. We confirm through numerical simulation that the combination of multi-level impulse source (i.e., explosive) array and extended cable used in the seismic acquisition is crucial for improving the imaging quality.
With that, we’re going to be recording a minimum of four stacks, with a receiver interval of 25 meters. The array will have a shot interval of 50 meters, with a 25 meter near offset, and a 2500 meter far offset. We will attempt to record 180 channels, off-end, with a sampling period of 0.5 seconds, and a record length of 5 seconds. We’ll sail the same course 4 times to verify previous records and attempt to add ‘fold’, i.e., extra data from the same point, to the overall records.
That’s the plan, at least.
Loads of preparation, logistics, and execution.
After a half an hour or so, both Volna and Ack are finished with the national scientists.
They set down their notebooks, pens, notes, and pointers; walk out of the meeting room and directly over to the galley.
“Hungry, fellas?” I inquire.
“Rock?”, Ack asks, “You have explosives here, right? Sink us. Just fucking sink us right now.” As he pours himself and Volna a stiff shot of real vodka.
“Uh, oh. Problems in Dreamland?” I ask, utilizing the derogatory name for the geophysical domain of exploration data.
“Un-be-fucking-believable.”, Volna adds.
“Your colloquial American is coming along well, Volna.” I snickered a bit.
“I learn from you”, he spat, “Cannot believe this. They don’t record while underway. They tow single array and stop. Then drop dynamite over side. They record. Then they do it again. Claim this gives them good fold. This is bullshit. You said devise program. HA! Take us to shore and let me teach them the fucking basics of geophysical acquisition. Then in a few years, we come back and do it right.”
“Oh, fuck”, I reply, wincing, “That bad?”
“Oh, no”, Ack continues, “It’s worse.” As he down 100 milliliters of booze in one draught and pours another for Volna and is own self, “No on-board demultiplexing. No on-board pre-processing. No-onboard QA/QC. No on-board anything. It’s fucking hopeless. Sink us, I’d rather take my chances with the sharks.”
“They can’t do all that stuff or they won’t do all that stuff,” I asked, expecting the worst.
“Oh, it might be possible, with this museum-grade crap they call a computer they have on-board. It’s just time-consuming, tricky, and will need constant attention. But with this raft of sad-sacks, flub-a-dubs and third rate hobbyists?” Ack and Volna agree as one.
“Consider it job security”, I replied, “How about this? One test loop and we use that data to do what’s necessary; just once. Then we can say we’ve shown them the way. After that, I’ll leave it up to the National scientists.”
“Good thing we have 2 full days, Rock”, Volna said, “Because we do a single AC (acquisition) run, it’ll take the rest of the time to show these buggers how it’s done.”
“Ack? You agree?” I asked.
Ack agreed, in spades.
“OK, gentlemen”, I said, “Let’s make it so. About time, too. I haven’t blown anything up in a couple of weeks. I’m getting antsy. Let’s go tell them the good news.”
“NO! WE REFUSE!” was the cheery response from the nationals when Ack, Volna, and I laid out the rather lengthy program for the next couple of days.
“OK. Someone tell the Captain to head for home. We’re done here.” I calmly told our handlers and the translators.
Panic in Pyongyang.
Immediately, there is this hue and cry about how this was not supposed to be how this trip was going to work. This was to be an acquisition trip only. This was to be a one-off to show Best Korea geophysical prowess. This was supposed to be data gathering trip on the Western scientists…
That last one was a bit of a mistake.
I turn to one of the translators and ask them to re-translate that last part, just in case I was hearing imaginary things.
“Oh, yes”, he replied, “He said they were here to gather data on the Western Scientists as well as offshore data.”
“Is that a fact?” I reacted. “Please tell them I need to see all my team members on the fantail immediately if you would. Sorry, translators and nationals not included in this little meeting.”
We reconvene on the fantail a few minutes later. I walk in on this little conclave with cigar and drink in hand.
“OK, gents”, I say, puffing a huge blue cloud, swigging a tot, “Here’s what I think we, as responsible international scientists, should do in this regrettable situation. We were asked to come here, with provisions that we would not be under cynosure, observation, or surveillance. Given ‘Open and Free Access’, no questions asked. We were to be treated as “esteemed guests”. This is obviously a load of dingo’s kidneys. I think we need to get as creative as possible and do whatever we can to provide as much deliberate misinformation to these characters to annoy, amaze, or disgust them as much as possible. Comments?”
There’s a general buzz, but no real dissention. After a few moment's discussion, Dax suggests we get a load of XXXXL condoms, and leave them around packaged as “Texas Medium”.
“That’s the spirit”, I reply. “Anyone one else up for a little Psychological Operations on our not-so-clever-nor-truthful hosts?”
We all agree that we will, in our own little way, start a campaign of deliberate misinformation, misdirection, and general petty bullshit nastiness for our hosts to discover and by which be dismayed.
Everyone’s in agreement. This trip has been a rotund bale of jeers from the get-go.
Promises made, promises broken. Itineraries approved then inexplicably disapproved. We make requests, they accede; and then nothing ever happens. It’s most frustrating.
We’re tolerating a lot of horse, bull, cow, and assorted other farmyard excrements; all in the name of international harmony and scientific goodwill. This has been an outgoing one-way street for too long. We’re mad as hell and we’re not going to take it anymore.
“Hellfire and Dalmatians!” I growl, growing angrier every minute I think about the subject, “We need to take the high, low, and middle ground on this offensive. Nothing too overt or obvious; however we need to jank these bastards good. But they can’t realize they’re being janked…!”
Ack cuts in.
“The esteemed Dr. Rock is right. Psychotic...but absolutely right. We got to take these bastards. We could fight them with conventional weapons. That could take years...cost millions of lives. In this case... I think we have to go all out. I think this situation absolutely requires...a really futile and stupid gesture... be done on somebody's part.”
There’s a general buzz among the assembled.
“And we're just the guys to do it.”
Shouts and catcalls of deep agreement.
“Operation ‘Confound-a-Korean’” is now enacted.
“About fucking time!”
“Let’s do it!”
“Dissen gonna be bery messy! Me no watchin!”
“OK, I think, “Who’s the prequel-series wiseass?”
“OK, gentlemen”, I continue, “We continue with our scientific duties. No fucking around there. But, when it comes to…interpretation…opinion…or personal viewpoint; let’s go full impede. Dazzle them with brilliance or baffle them with bullshit.”
We all agree and after a couple of quick rounds of old thought provoker, we realize this trip has just taken a hard left into Wackyland. We will have to let our comrades onshore know of this, but that can wait until we return. Right now, we all have jobs to do. Real jobs, serious jobs, covert and sneaky jobs…
So, it’s back to the recording shack as we lay out the plans for the next couple of days.
Volna begins: “OK, listen up you primitive screwheads. We’re going to assemble and layout a recording array that’s called a Meisenheimer Triplet. You do know what a simple Meisenheimer Triplet is, don’t you?”
There’s a slight murmur from our national friends, but in the end, they all plead ignorance.
“Right. Thought so. A Meisenheimer Triplet is a central towed array flanked by two shorter, subparallel flanking sub-frammitz arrays. We will assemble this array on-board, even though it’s probably going to take every ounce of silver solder and electrician’s tape you’ve got. The amount of data received is orders of magnitude greater than any single Sheriff-sonde array, like the ones you been using.”
Suddenly, there are nods and murmurs of agreement.
“Right”, Volna smiles sinisterly to me, “With that, we’ll need to devise an explosive package, well, actually, a series of explosive packages based on the harmonia of the pre-bottom fore-sets, water depth, tow vehicle velocity, water column density, and decomposition coefficients of the said water column. Oh, yeah. Fish too.”
Volna is really getting into the spirit of the affair.
“Who is your explosives engineer?” Ack asks, “He’s going to have to do some serious number-crunching with all the pre-blast data we’ll need to supply. “
One quick translation and there’s nothing but long faces and querulous looks from our national crowd.
“We have no explosives engineer”, the head Best Korean geophysicist laments. “Explosives are very, very heavily regulated by the government. That’s why we have several Government Observers on board. They handle the explosives.”
“Oh?” Ack remarks, “Are they fully up to speed on the Barnard-Reichmann equations for hydro-displacement of serial charges? Which subset of the marine rarefication coefficients do they employ?”
“Ummm, don’t know.” was the answer.
“Don’t know? Well”, Volna continues, “Then, they must be pretty good with the Langefors-Kihlström formulae, right?”
“No. Not as such.” Came the response.
“I see”, Ack sighs, “Well, then, I guess they must utilize the Il’yushin algorithms then. OK, it’s a bit old school, but they should still work.”
“Ah. Well. No.” was the rejoinder they offered.
“Well, then what the fuck do they use?” Volna explodes, “A modified Ambraseys-Hendorn model? Ghosh-Damen 1? Ghosh-Damen 2? Indian Fargin Standard? Prejaculated Rai-Singh protocols, fer’ chrissake? Which?”
Nothing but shaking heads and wringing hands.
“They take a case of dynamite, wire it up, and throw it overboard with a long fuse.” Was the eventual answer. “That’s why we stop to record.”
Long, exasperated sigh later, “Jesus Q. Tapdancing Christ on a crème cracker. No wonder you never get anything done.” Volna continues, “You characters are in luck. You just happen to be so lucky to have an internationally-renowned Master Blaster right here on board ship today.”
Volna turns the crowd over to me, “Doctor? Do your damnedest. And good luck.”
“Thanks, Volna”, I say, cigar in one hand, stalwart drink in the other, “OK, guys. Here’s the deal. When it comes to explosives and explosive design, I’m the hookin’ bull. No one has authority over me. Not the Captain. Not the boson’s mate. Not the Captain’s Consort even. Nor the guys in the cheap shiny suits. What I say, goes. No exceptions. No hesitation. We green or are we going back to shore?”
Cholog?” they ask.
“Yes. ‘Cholog’. Green. Are we understanding one another? Are we all in agreement? Are you fuckin’ diggin’ me, Beaumont?
There’s some quick back and forth in Korean, a lot of seeming bad noise. Even the shiny suit squad and Coasties join in the fun.
“Grudgingly, we agree. Green as you say, Doctor Rock. You are the one in charge.” Came the head national’s reply.
“Splendid. I’m in charge of the charges.” I chuckle, puffing an enormous cloud of expensive Oscuro smoke, “Volna, Ack; please get me the required parameters. I’ll be in the ordnance locker to see what we’re working with here. C’mon fellas, chop-chop!”
Volna and Ack take their select set of geophysical wishers and wannabes while I get the rest of the locals, the shiny suit squad in reserve, but in tow.
I head off to the ordinance locker.
Dax runs behind “Hey! Wait for me.”
“We have to”, I snigger a reply, “We’re going to need a drinks runner.”
“Marvelous…” was the one-word response.
We get to the locked ordinance locker. It’s one of the few original structures remaining on the ship. The boat was torn down almost to the waterline and re-built for seismic acquisition, but they had enough brains to realize that the source of the seismic signals was usually explosive in nature. Dinoseis and Mini-Sossie were closed books to them.
Therefore, the locker remained intact, however grudgingly.
“Whew! And what a locker.” I whewed. “And what a lock. OK, who’s got the keys?”
There are general hemming and hawing and no one seems to know where the keys for the ordinance locker are kept.
“Well, gents”, I say, pointedly, “I would suggest that one or more of you toddle off and fucking find the goddamn keys or this will turn out to be a very short and unproductive trip, indeed.”
A while later, a bit longer than I personally care for, the boat’s Captain wanders up, all a-scowl and generally pissed-off looking.
“Who here needs the key to the explosives locker?” He asks in his Captainly, no-nonsense manner.
There’s more muttering and murmuring, but eventually, all fingers point toward me.
The Captain looks at me.
He’s giving me the once over with a LASER stink eye. I don’t know which irritated him the most; the lit cigar, the drink, the Stetson, Hawaiian shirt, cargo shorts, Scottish knee socks or field boots.
“And who the hell are you”? He asks, oh, so wrongly, through an interpreter.
I stand up, fully puffed to full mammalian threat posture and say in a loud steady voice;
“I’m THE Doctor Rocknocker, the MOTHERFUCKING PRO FROM DOVER!, that’s who.”
Since I had a good 6 inches and way too many kilos on him; my loud, American and very un-oriental answer took him completely by surprise.
His eyes got as big as dinner plates and he shakily held out the ring of keys for the explosives locker.
“Why thank you very much”, I said, bowing in his direction ever so slightly. Wasn’t his fault he wasn’t totally clued in on all the recent goings-on aboard his vessel.
I toss the keys to Dax, “Here, earn your keep.” I snickered.
Dax deftly fields the keys, chuckles back, and begins the game of ‘which key for which lock’?
I thank the Captain and explain that I’m the de facto leader of this special education class, and make some pointed, mild epitaphs about landlubbers, national scientists, and the cargo of the totally clueless on board.
He sees I’m not a total boor and relaxes some. We haven’t really had a real introduction, so I grab a translator and engage the Captain in a short, though insightful conversation.
Cigars were exchanged. Handshakes were as well.
Seems he’s just as aggravated by these know-it-alls who really know-fuck-all. We see eye to eye and part friends once Dax finally figures out the combination to the weapons locker.
“Holy fuck!” I exclaim, “Now that’s a door.” I say looking at the slowly-opening covering of the weapon’s portico. Fully five solid inches of solid steel. Triple reinforced hinges. Deadman's latches. Bringles-jams and solid, non-decabulated cast-steel cross-members.
Just the thing to contain an errant blast and send all that excess energy skyward instead of into the bowels of the boat.
OK, bonus points for that design feature.
I look inside, but it’s dark and fragrant as the inside of an irritated oyster in the bottom of the Tonga-Kermadec Trench.
Dax fumbles around and finds the light switch.


“Hmmm.” I hmmed. “Well, we’re all set for dynamite, I see.”
Case after case after case of leaking, cheap-ass Chinese knock-off sort-of Du Pont-style 50% dynamite. Box after box of Pseudo-Dyno-Nobel blasting caps. Delaminating, unwinding spools after spool of “PrimUcord”. Sticky “Korea” brand silk-woven coated Demolition Wire.
“Gads.” I sigh. “What a nightmare. Either this stuff goes off when you give it a dirty look or it doesn’t go off at all.”
Dax looks to me, “So, the trip’s a bust. Is that what you’re saying?”
“If we don’t find something that’ll work, probably,” I reply. “This shit’s worthless.”
We continue to search after I shoo everyone but Dax out of the locker. It’s damp and musty in here, smelling disconcertingly of kerosene, gherkins, and old sardines. That’s one sure sign of dynamite going bad. I warn Dax to be extra careful, that this stuff hasn’t had the best of handling. We could be in for an unexpected surprise.
So, we redouble our efforts and are much more circumspect.
Knock-off this and fake-ass that.
All Chinese in origin. It might have worked one day; but after sitting in here, unattended, unturned, and uncared for? I’m ready to both literally and figuratively pull the plug on this whole fiasco.
Dax is all smiles.
“Doctor?” Dax asks, “What is it that would make you happy?”
“A nice fishing boat, a huge never-emptying bank account, endless cigars, and a comfy chair back in the north of Baja Canada in a tavern on a good fishing lake,” I replied.
“Well”, Dax smiles, “I can’t do that, but how about this?” as he opens a cleverly hidden door.
I look in, let my eyes adjust to the low-light scenario to see no lakes, no huge bank accounts, nor fishing boats; but what I do see makes me smile wide.
It’s a sub-locker full of familiar Made-in-the-USA, True Blue, American-manufacture cyclo-trimethylene-tri-nitramine, or Good Ol’ C-4 explosive. Block after lovely hexahedral block of the stuff.
“Dax”, I say, “Take a gold star out of petty cash. You’ve just saved the mission.”
“I’ll settle for a tall vodka and one of your cigars”, Dax smiles.
“Later”, I say, “We now have a little job which to attend.”
With C-4, designing the impulse charges is seriously a walk in the park. They’re already waterproof, so all I need is water depth and the number of seconds to which they want to record data. I can bundle a series of blocks of the stuff, charge them with a couple-three or four, just in case, blasting caps, and connect them with stout lengths of demolition wire. These will be dragged, with a ‘Herring Dodger’, to control depth, behind the boat as we are underway.
It’s a novel idea, I know. One that’s only been in use in the west for about 60 years.
We’ll drag a daisy chain of C-4 packets. One after another, individual charges in the packets will detonate milliseconds apart. I can bundle the packets so that we can run a charge string of up to 12 discrete packets which will attenuate the amplification of the arrhythmic flux, I tell one of my Korean onlookers.
With this set-up, we can record data for literally sea-miles.
First, we will moosh the C-4 into a flattened, semi-hydrodynamically stable pancake or airfoil, OK, hydrofoil, shape; wire three or five of them together, charge them, then repeat.
Depending on what parameters Volna and Ack supply, the chain will just be a number of similar packets, trailing one after the other, detonating from back to front; down below the hydrophones, but well above the seafloor.
We know that the hydrophones will be at or very near the surface, but we need to know, explicitly, the basal bathymetry of the area we're about to shoot. Wouldn’t do anyone any good if we drove over a seafloor hump and dragged the C-4 over it to have it detonate prematurely.
Or not at all.
So, we need to plot our course and sail it today while we get the hydrophone arrays built and we image the seafloor where we’re going to do some blasting. After that, it’ll probably be an all-nighter to create the blasting strings so we can spend the next day recording, and then head for home as we’re nearly out of victuals and potables.
At least, that’s the plan.
I convene a quick meeting and we plot a course on the latest charts. 30 kilometers of recording.
Shit, that’s going to be a lot of explosives. Doable, but a pain.
Remembering the quality of the recording equipment, I suggest we do a test run in the morning of just 5 kilometers. If that works, and we can up it in increments.
Dax, Sagong the head Korean geophysicist, and I go to visit the Captain.
We visit the Captain and lay out our plans. He has no objections, as were in Best Korean waters and there are no obstacles out here like sunken wrecks, kelp forests, American aircraft carriers, or other impediments.
With that, we tell him to align the ship and let us know when he can begin doing the recon sortie.
He says that he can do that immediately, and before we're out of the pilothouse, we’re recording bathymetric, i.e., depth, data. The technology’s not much different, nor advanced, than a standard Lake Winnebago fish finder, so that’s one disaster sorted.
We are sailing along in a series of parallel straight lines, which when the data are played back and deconvoluted, will give us a good idea of the bathymetry which we’ve been motoring over. It’ll basically give us both a depth map and a surface, ok, bottom, map of the seafloor above which we’re sailing. A little basic submarine hyperbolic quantum trigonometry and well, we have the data we need to plug into the various equations to see what we’ll require when we want to record seismic data to 5000 milliseconds.
With that, there’s not much else to do until we have the survey map. I dragoon Dax and Cliff into helping me inventory the explosives bunker.
“The hell with the dynamite, PrimUcord, and other Oriental-Knockoff Horseshit”, I instruct my helpers, “Let’s just count up the C-4, and see what our tally is. Oh, yeah, give me a tally of the blasting caps. Gotta use those ratty bastards, they’re the only actuators here I sort of, kind of, trust.”
With Dax, myself, and Cliff, we’re done in less than an hour. I decide that I’ll be the keeper of the keys and take them back to the Captain my own self. Rules of engagements, chain of command and all that hogwash.
I hand the keys over to the Captain and instruct the co-pilot to make an entry in the logbook that I returned the key to the Captain, this date, this time.
“By the book. It’s not just a good idea, it’s the law.” I muse.
To be continued
submitted by Rocknocker to Rocknocker [link] [comments]

2019.06.24 18:15 UnderPressureVS The German version of TNG can be weird at times.

This is going to be a hell of a long post. Inspired by this post by u/cyberneticSatan.
While I personally rather like the German dubbing of Star Trek, the altered episode titles range from literal and uncreative to downright terrible. I'm going to translate every single German title from TNG for you all to enjoy. Sometimes I might feel the need to add context or crack a joke. If a title is blue, you can hover over it to see the comment I've left.
Disclaimer: German is not my first language. I currently have a very solid grasp of the language, but I'm not yet entirely fluent. In addition, many of these titles rely on somewhat obscure words or phrases I may not have heard. If I make a mistake, or if you're a native speaker and you disagree with a comment, don't hesitate to say so.
AND NOW: The German TNG Reverse-Translated Drinking Game!
If the title is directly translated, don't drink. The conditions only count if they're true of the German title and not the English one.
Drink every time:
...the title contains a character's name
...the title literally just describes a character (i.e. 'Avatar' --> 'The Blue Cat-People')
...something happens 'on planet [X]'
...the title is just 'planet [X]' or 'planet of [X]'
...the title is just a literal, non-creative description of the episode's events
...the title is phrased as a question
Down your whole drink if:
...the title contains spoilers
...the title is wrong and blatantly misrepresents the episode
...the title makes absolutely no sense

Season 1

E1/2 Encounter at Farpoint - Mission Farpoint - Mission Farpoint
E3 The Naked Now - Gedankengift - Thought Poison
E4 Code of Honor - Der Ehrenkodex - The Honor Code The Code of Honor
E5 The Last Outpost - Der Wächter - The Guardians
E6 Where No One Has Gone Before - Der Reisende - The Traveller
E7 Lonely Among Us - Die geheimnisvolle Kraft - The Mysterious Force
E8 Justice - Das Gesetz der Edo - The Law of the Edo
E9 The Battle - Die Schlacht von Maxia - The Battle of Maxia
E10 Hide and Q - Rikers Versuchung - Riker's Temptation
E11 Haven - Die Frau seiner Träume - The Woman of His Dreams
E12 The Big Goodbye - Der große Abschied - The Big Goodbye
E13 Datalore - Das Duplikat - The Duplicate
E14 Angel One - Planet Angel One - Planet Angel One
E15 11001001 - 11001001 - 11001001
E16 Too Short a Season - Die Entscheidung des Admirals - The Admirals' Decision
E17 When the Bough Breaks - Die Sorge der Aldeaner - The Care Worry of the Aldeans
E18 Home Soil - Ein Planet wehrt sich - A Planet Defends Itself
E19 Coming of Age - Prüfungen - Tests
E20 Heart of Glory - Worfs Brüder - Worf's Brother
E21 The Arsenal of Freedom - Die Waffenhändler - The Weapons Dealers
E22 Symbiosis - Die Seuche - The Plague
E23 Skin of Evil - Die schwarze Seele - The Black Soul
E24 We'll Always Have Paris - Begegnung mit der Vergangenheit - Encounter with the Past
E25 Conspiracy - Die Verschwörung - Conspiracy
E26 The Neutral Zone - Die Neutrale Zone - The Neutral Zone

Season 2

E1 The Child - Das Kind - The Child
E2 Where Silence Has Lease - Illusion oder Wirklichkeit? - Illusion or Reality?
E3 Elementary, Dear Data - Sherlock Data Holmes - Sherlock Data Holmes
E4 The Outrageous Okona - Der unmögliche Captain Okona - The Impossible Outrageous Captain Okona
E5 Loud as a Whisper - Der stumme Vermittler - The Silent Mediator
E6 The Schizoid Man - Das fremde Gedächtnis - The Foreign Mind
E7 Unnatural Selection - Die jungen Greise - The Young Old People
E8 A Matter of Honor - Der Austauschoffizier - The Exchange Officer
E9 The Measure of a Man - Wem gehört Data? - To Whom does Data Belong?
E10 The Dauphin - Die Thronfolgerin - The [Female] Heir to the Throne
E11 Contagion - Die Iconia-Sonden - The Iconian Probes
E12 The Royale - Hotel Royale - Hotel Royale
E13 Time Squared - Die Zukunft schweigt - The Future Remains Silent
E14 The Icarus Factor - Rikers Vater - Riker's Father
E15 Pen Pals - Brieffreunde - Pen Pals
E16 Q Who - Zeitsprung mit Q - Time-Jump with Q
E17 Samaritan Snare - Das Herz eines Captains - The Heart of a Captain
E18 Up The Long Ladder - Der Planet der Klone - The Planet of Clones
E19 Manhunt - Andere Sterne, andere Sitten - Different Stars, Different Morals
E20 The Emissary - Klingonenbegegnung - Klingon Encounter
E21 Peak Performance - Galavorstellung - Gala Performance
E22 Shades of Gray - Kraft der Träume - The Power of Dreams

Season 3

E1 Evolution - Die Macht der Naniten - The Power of Nanites
E2 The Ensigns of Command - Die Macht der Paragraphen - The Power of Paragraphs
E3 The Survivors - Die Überlebenden auf Rana-Vier - The Survivors on Rana Four
E4 Who Watches the Watchers - Der Gott der Mintakaner - The God of the Mintakans
E5 The Bonding - Mutterliebe - Motherly Love
E6 Booby Trap - Das Energiefalle - The Energy Trap
E7 The Enemy - Auf schmalem Grat - On the Narrow Ridge
E8 The Price - Der Barzanhandel - The Barzan Deal
E9 The Vengeance Factor - Yuta, die Letzte ihres Clans - Yuta, the Last of her Clan
E10 The Defector - Der Überläufer - The Defector
E11 The Hunted - Die Verfemten - The Ostracized
E12 The High Ground - Terror auf Rutia-Vier - Terror on Rutia-Four
E13 Deja Q - Noch einmal Q - Once Again Q
E14 A Matter of Perspective - Riker Unter Verdacht - Riker Under Suspicion
E15 Yesterday's Enterprise - Die Alte Enterprise - The Old Enterprise
E16 The Offspring - Datas Nachkomme - Data's Decendant
E17 Sins of the Father - Die Sünden des Vaters - The Sins of the Father
E18 Allegiance - Versuchskaninchen - Guinea Pigs
E19 Captain's Holiday - Picard macht Urlaub - Picard Takes a Vacation
E20 Tin Man - Der Telepath - The Telepath
E21 Hollow Pursuits - Der schüchterne Reginald - The Timid Reginald
E22 The Most Toys - Der Sammler - The Collector
E23 Sarek - Botschafter Sarek - Ambassador Sarek
E24 Ménage à Troi - Die Damen Troi - The Ladies Troi
E25 Transfigurations - Wer ist John? - Who is John?
E26 The Best of Both Worlds, Part 1 - In den Händen der Borg - In the Hands of the Borg

Season 4

E1 The Best of Both Worlds, Part 2 - Angriffsziel Erde - Invasion-target: Earth
E2 Family - Familienbegegnung - Family Meeting
E3 Brothers - Die ungleichen Brüder - The Different Brothers
E4 Suddenly Human - Endars Sohn - Endar's Son
E5 Remember Me - Das Experiment - The Experiment
E6 Legacy - Die Rettungsoperation - The Rescue Operation
E7 Reunion - Tödliche Nachfolge - Deadly Succession
E8 Future Imperfect - Gedächtnisverlust - Memory Loss
E9 Final Mission - Die letzte Mission - The Last Mission
E10 The Loss - Das kosmische Band - The Cosmic String
E11 Data's Day - Datas Tag - Data's Day
E12 The Wounded - Der Rachefeldzug - The Revenge Campaign
E13 Devil's Due - Der Pakt mit dem Teufel - The Deal with the Devil
E14 Clues - Beweise - Evidence
E15 First Contact - Erster Kontakt - First Contact
E16 Galaxy's Child - Die Begegnung im Weltraum - The Encounter in Space
E17 Night Terrors - Augen in der Dunkelheit - Eyes in the Dark
E18 Identity Crisis - Der unbekannte Schatten - The Unknown Shadow
E19 The Nth Degree - Die Reise ins Ungewisse - The Journey into the Unknown
E20 Qpid - Gefangen in der Vergangenheit - Trapped in the Past
E21 The Drumhead - Das Standgericht - The Drumhead
E22 Half a Life - Die Auflösung - The Termination
E23 The Host - Odan, der Sonderbotschafter - Odan, the Special Ambassador
E24 The Mind's Eye - Verräterische Signale - The Treacherous Signal
E25 In Theory - Datas erste Liebe - Data's First Love
E26 Redemption (Part 1) - Der Kampf um das Klingonische Reich: Teil 1 - The Battle for the Klingon Empire: Part 1

Season 5

E1 Redemption (Part 2) - Der Kampf um das Klingonische Reich: Teil 2 - The Battle for the Klingon Empire: Part 2
E2 Darmok - Darmok - Darmok
E3 Ensign Ro - Fähnrich Ro - Ensign Ro
E4 Silicon Avatar - Das Recht auf Leben - The Right to Live
E5 Disaster - Katastrophe auf der Enterprise - Catastrophe on the Enterprise
E6 The Game - Gefährliche Spielsucht - Dangerous Gambling Addiction
E7/8 Unification - Wiedervereinigung? - Reunification?
E9 A Matter of Time - Der zeitrisende Historiker - The Time-Travelling Historian
E10 New Ground - Die Soliton-Welle - The Soliton Wave
E11 Hero Worship - Der einzige Überlebende - The Sole Survivor
E12 Violations - Geistige Gewalt - Mental Assault
E13 The Masterpiece Society - Das künstliche Paradies - The Artifical Paradise
E14 Conundrum - Mission ohne Gedächtnis - Mission without Memory
E15 Power Play - Ungebente Gäste - Uninvited Guests
E16 Ethics - Die Operation - The Operation
E17 The Outcast - Verbotene Liebe - Forbidden Love
E18 Cause and Effect - Déjà vu - Déjà Vu
E19 The First Duty - Ein missglücktes Manöver - A Failed Maneuver
E20 Cost of Living - Hochzeit mit Hindernissen - Wedding with Obstacles
E21 The Perfect Mate - Eine hoffnungslose Romanze - A Hopeless Romance
E22 Imaginary Friend - Die imaginäre Freundin - The Imaginary Friend
E23 I, Borg - Ich bin Hugh - I Am Hugh
E24 The Next Phase - So nah und doch so fern - So Close, But Yet So Far
E25 The Inner Light - Das zweite Leben - The Second Life
E26 Time's Arrow (Part 1) - Gefahr aus dem 19. Jarhundert: Teil 1 - Danger from the 19th Century: Part 1

Season 6

E1 Time's Arrow (Part 2) - Gefahr aus dem 19. Jarhundert: Teil 2 - Danger from the 19th Century: Part 2
E2 Realm of Fear - Todesangst beim Beamen - Mortal Fear of Beaming
E3 Man of the People - Der unmoralische Friedensvermittler - The Immoral Peace-broker
E4 Relics - Besuch von der alten Enterprise - Visit from the Old Enterprise
E5 Schisms - In den Subraum entführt - Abducted into Subspace
E6 True Q - Eine echte „Q“ - A Real Q
E7 Rascals - Erwachsene Kinder - Grown-up Children
E8 A Fistful of Datas - Eine Handvoll Datas - A Fistful of Datas
E9 The Quality of Life - Datas Hypothese - Data's Hypothesis
E10/11 Chain of Command - Geheime Mission auf Celtris Drei - Secret Mission on Celtris Three
E12 Ship in a Bottle - Das Schiff in der Flasche - The Ship in the Bottle
E13 Aquiel - Aquiel - Aquiel
E14 Face of the Enemy - Das Gesicht des Feindes - The Face of the Enemy
E15 Tapestry - Wilkommen im Leben nach dem Tode - Welcome to Life After Death
E16/17 Birthright - Der Moment der Erkenntnis - The Moment of Recognition
E18 Starship Mine - In der Hand von Terroristen - In the Hand of Terrorists
E19 Lessons - Der Feuersturm - The Firestorm
E20 The Chase - Das fehlende Fragment - The Missing Fragment
E21 Frame of Mind - Phantasie oder Wahrheit? - Fantasy or Truth?
E22 Suspicions - Verdächtigungen - Suspicions
E23 Rightful Heir - Der rechtmäßige Erbe - The Rightful Heir
E24 Second Chances - Riker : 2 = ? - Riker : 2 = ?
E25 Timescape - Gefangen in einem temporären Fragment - Trapped in a Temporal Fragment
E26 Descent (Part 1) - Angriff der Borg: Teil 1 - Attack of the Borg: Part 1

Season 7

E1 Descent (Part 2) - Angriff der Borg: Teil 2 - Attack of the Borg: Part 2
E2 Liaisons - Indiskretionen - Indiscretions
E3 Interface - Das Interace - The Interface
E4/5 Gambit - Der Schachzug - The Chess-move
E6 Phantasms - Traumanlyse - Dream-analysis
E7 Dark Page - Ort der Finsternis - Place of Darkness
E8 Attached - Kontakte - Contact
E9 Force of Nature - Die Raumkatastrophe - The Space-Catastrophe
E10 Inheritance - Soongs Vermächtnis - Soong's Legacy
E11 Parallels - Parallels - Parallels
E12 The Pegasus - Das Pegasus-Projekt - The Pegasus Project
E13 Homeward - Die oberste Direktive - The Prime Directive
E14 Sub Rosa - Ronin - Ronin
E15 Lower Decks - Beförderung - Promotion
E16 Thine Own Self - Radioaktiv - Radioactive
E17 Masks - Der Komet - The Comet
E18 Eye of the Beholder - Der Fall „Utopia Planitia“ - The Case of Utopia Planitia
E19 Genesis - Genesis - Genesis
E20 Journey's End - Am Ende der Reise - At the Journey's End
E21 Firstborn - Ritus des Aufsteigens - The Rite of Ascension
E22 Bloodlines - Boks Vergeltung - Bok's Retribution
E23 Emergence - Neue Intelligenz - New Intelligence
E24 Preemptive Strike - Die Rückkehr von Ro Laren - The Return of Ro Laren
E25/26 All Good Things... - Gestern, heute, morgen - Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
submitted by UnderPressureVS to startrek [link] [comments]

2019.04.02 10:23 pooja485 Global Luxury Yacht Market Key Players, Applications, Recent Developments, and Comprehensive Forecast to 2024

Global Luxury Yacht Market Research Report offers complete knowledge, forecast and statistical analysis on past, present and forecast industry situations. The risks and growth opportunities associated with global Luxury Yacht market are highlighted in this study. The Luxury Yacht study will drive investment decisions and strategic business plans for a successful and sustainable business. The market growth in terms of CAGR value is presented from 2019-2024. The high-level data pertaining to Luxury Yacht market trends, supply-demand statistics, production volume and market demand is evaluated. Also, the cost structures, the latest Global Luxury Yacht Industry plans and policies and management strategies are explained.
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Azimut/Benetti Ferretti Group Sanlorenzo Sunseeker Feadship L�rssen Princess Yachts Amels / Damen Heesen Yachts Horizon Westport Oceanco Trinity Yachts Fipa Group Overmarine Perini Navi Palmer Johnson Cerri - Baglietto Christensen
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In-depth assessment of segment and subsegment are given below
Types of Global Luxury Yacht Market:
Motor Luxury Yachts Sailing Luxury Yachts
Applications of Global Luxury Yacht Market:
Private Use Commercial Use Special Use
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The risk associated with raw material sources, cost structures and emerging competitor’s feasibility are studied. The growth percentage in the coming years, as well as Global Luxury Yacht market segments reflecting heavy growth, are presented in the report. The sales data of players, their regional presence, suppliers, revenue structure and manufacturing process is explained. Also, import-export details and production volume is reflected in this study.
The Global Luxury Yacht market share in k MT and revenue in USD Million is portrayed for the different product types. The industry demand, business strategies will help in understanding the workflow and development trends. The macro and microeconomic factors fueling market development are verified. The analysis of capacity, sales price, market trends and consumption status is conducted. The new product launch events, mergers & acquisitions and innovations in Global Luxury Yacht Market are also presented in this report.
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The report users and industry aspirants will have complete knowledge on Global Luxury Yacht market present status and upcoming future developments. The expected cost of products, growth trends and product value in coming years is presented. Also, the growth opportunities, profit-making ventures and successful business plans can be built efficiently. All the well-established, mid-level, as well as emerging players, can analyze the market scope, market size and growth opportunities. Detailed research on every niche region/countries offers fundamental market statistics and outlook.
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